“For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect. He was chosen before the creation of the world, but was revealed in these last times for your sake. Through him you believe in God, who raised him from the dead and glorified him, and so your faith and hope are in God.”

1 Peter 1:18-21

There are situations when we really feel we have gone too far, and have sinned badly. Our sins heap up in the great wave of blame and condemnation. We have done things we are so ashamed of and when we look back at what we have done, it horrifies us. Why did we do it? What were we thinking about? We have no excuse and our sins of accuse us and overwhelms our mind and heart. We question everything about ourselves. Am I really a Christian? If I am a Christian, why did I do that? Why did I say such things that hurt the ones I love? Do I really love them and say such things?

This is the dilemma of the Depression for wrong-doing and failure. It is very difficult to cope with, and you are at the bottom of a deep pit, and you cant see the way out. Who can deal with this situation? Who can reach down and rescue this soul? We instinctively know the answer is Jesus Christ the Saviour of the world. But we have fallen so badly, and am rejected by those close to me. I’ve really done it this time. I thought what I was doing was a good idea and the words I said were teaching my family the right way. I have taken upon myself the robe of the prophet and am intent on setting things right, as I see it.

This is not my role, and is not what I should be doing. I am too much Elijah and not enough Mary Magdalene. I have almost lost my hope in Christ, and interpret the rejection of others, as rejection by Him. I have failed at the most important thing- my marriage. I have hurt my husband by what I have said and done. The guilt is overwhelming and I can hardly think of him without anxiety taking hold. What can fix this?

The obvious answer is in the Scripture verse. Jesus came to pay the price of sin, no matter what it is like, and He can forgive all who repent and come to Him. This may take some time to really take hold of in the mind and there will be days of trouble and heartache, and heart break. In His mercy, He will forgive and give us peace.

However, there are consequences for what we do and say. Somethings cannot be put back the way they were. Sometimes we have to be satisfied with what we get and be content to have little and the lack of closeness can be hurtful, but we have to take responsibility for our failure and do whatever we can to make amends. There may be nothing we can do. We just pray that God will soften hearts and make things better. We pray for salvation for our nearest and dearest, even though our love has failed. You may find yourself in a situation where it is just you and God. You put your hope in Him and ask Him to stay with you. The Lord Jesus is your only hope. Your life may shrink and become a battle with anxiety and your failure, but we pray for His mercy that will keep us and forgive us for all our fault.

Jesus is the only one who can do this, because He is able and has everlasting love for the repentant heart. Jesus can do it because of who He is and what He has done. We rest on Him and put our faith in His Word and His promises. His power can forgive us, as the price is paid already and He can keep us and sustain us right to the end of our lives.

We will have to fight a deadly fight. We will have to pray and pray every day. We continually ask for His power and He will encourage us. He will not leave us comfort less, He will come to us. He Himself is our comfort and our sustaining power. Our love will fail, but His love will not. Our mind set is humble, grateful and sorry for sin. We contend with ourselves and pray to the Lord for forgiveness, until the light breaks through. Jesus came for sinners, and when we repent and turn away, we are forgiven and given the ability to fight the fight and is mercy and love will bring us through.