“Husbands, love your wives, and don’t be bitter against them.”

Love holds all things together, but it must be real and sincere. There is a godless Stoicism that will just doggedly keep on going, grit the teeth and carry on. It is not love or devotion and is hiding the real situation that can never be sorted out. It makes a marriage into a lie.

Husbands are especially targeted here in this verse for especial reminder that they must truly love their wives and not descend into the bonds of duty in marriage. If marriage is to last it must be true. We must make up our minds at the start what we want and we must work to ensure that our relationships stay honest and righteous.

It is too easy to become bitter and to become a hyper-critical spouse and men seem to be more prone to this. The Apostle Paul is reminding the men in the marriage relationship to pay close attention to being sincere and genuine in their love relationships and to truly love their wives as they love themselves.

Women can do many things that men find difficult and it is easy to sideline these skills and ignore the relational aspect of life and focus on the practical. It is too easy to denigrate someone who can do the things you cannot and to put our spouses down and sideline their abilities and gifts. If marriage is to be rich and successful, it must have the full love and devotion of both parties. Without this love, the marriage will eventually die. A person can hide and pretend but it will not last the ravages of life and the pressures put on relationships by the outside world. Love will conquer all and will overcome all obstacles and shine brightly as something everyone can look to and gain strength from. This is also what builds families and helps our children and grandchildren to grow. Fake devotion can never succeed because it is dishonest. True hearts will stay together and win the day with true devotion and faithfulness. Love wins.

“Having heard about your faith in Christ Jesus and your love for all the saints…”

Paul gives thanks to the Lord and prays for these true believes, because he has heard about their faith in the Lord Jesus and that they love each other as well. Paul knows how they are trusting in Christ and leaning upon Him for protection and rescue and have committed their souls to Him for salvation and heaven. Perhaps he has had conversations with Epaphrus and has had discussions about the church and the difficulties it faces as a body of believers.  Epaphrus was a spiritually minded brother, who also ended up in prison like the Apostle Paul. Paul is writing to encourage them all in the Lord Jesus their Saviour and to help them to have full confidence in Him alone. 

This love is the mark of the true Christian, and it is the seal that will keep the Christian in the love of God right to the very end of their lives and the end of the era. Many make the claim to be Christians in our time but this mark of the Spirit in not in their lives. Many claim to be Christians and have no feeling for other people, not even the people of God. This should not be. We can boast of our faith and can boast of our great works for God, but if there is no love for other believers, and love for those without a Saviour, we have not the love of God in our hearts and minds. 

“I saw, and behold, the Lamb standing on Mount Zion, and with him a number, one hundred forty-four thousand, having his name, and the name of his Father, written on their foreheads.”

Revelation 14:1

Christians are sealed with the Holy Spirit and kept safe until that great day of the marriage supper of the Lamb. We exhibit the fruits of the Holy Spirit who indwells the lives of the people of God and the greatest of these is Love. 

“Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God; and everyone who loves is born of God, and knows God.”

1 John 4:7

“I heard the number of those who were sealed, one hundred forty-four thousand, sealed out of every tribe of the children of Israel:”

Revelation 7:4

We do not love in word only but in deeds and acts of kindness and support for each other. To neglect each other is to not love, and we are not made perfect in love. These saints in Colosse were not like at, but prayed, sympathised with and served each other, as they saw need.